Sunday, October 16, 2016

The Art to Never Giving Up

Time is the essence of all things greatly produced. While we take time to talk about gratitude, we don't talk about our fears. In life, (especially under certain weathers), we have to find the motivation to fight, to say "fuck it, I don't deserve this", and strive for better. We need to know when to let go, and when to move on.

Continue to make your shit happen, but do it for you in your own time. Be motivated by you and by what you want--not by what you think others expect from you--be genuine with your denies. Even when you feel like you can't do anything, just do something--it will help. Keep yourself busy until you are busy.

Regardless, keep going because you never know when you will meet someone new, or go someplace amazing, or land a new job, buy a house, or have a baby. I'm serious when I say that I have seen dreams come true later in life, none of us, get it all, at the same time, and none of us can ever stop working towards the things we want from life.

You never know when the slot machine is going to give you a try a winning, but you've got to wait. The house often wins, but if you keep playing, and you keep trying, then your goals aren't too far from your reach.

Yes, waiting it seems like nothing, it feels like nothing, but time makes use of time, in it's own time. It always does, you just have to wait for it. In the meantime, embrace the small things that can change your day. Like having a good conversation with someone, or having a polite stranger wish you hello on the street.

The big things seem so vascular, but in reality it is the small things, which truly make or break or day. Perhaps it's the success at the office, but more importantly the small acts of human kindness, which mean more than anything.

Friday, May 27, 2016

You Make It True: The Calling Vs. The Job

 Having an idea about what you want and need is imperative towards building a healthy, happy and satisfying life. You can dream that you want one thing, only to find that it makes you miserable. What you dream about, might not even be your calling in life, but there is something you are destined to do. Consider the concept of a “calling” vs. a job, and which would make you feel the most content. You might have a job, but is it your calling? How do you define it? How do you really determine what marks a true calling? Growing up, was there anything that spoke to you? Did you see yourself in a particular industry? Was there anything that you excelled naturally at and enjoyed?
If you find that the work that you do is something, which you could never stop even if you tried. You have probably found a calling. Or if you find you love something so much, and you excel at it, you have probably found a calling. In the words of Michael Lewis, a columnist for Bloomberg News, “there’s a direct relationship between risk and reward. A fantastically rewarding career usually requires you to take a fantastic risk.”
It is not easy to do what you are destine to. In order to do what you love the most, you take a risk, but that risk is what makes it worth it. You could settle for a decent-paying job that you can stand, or you could take the rewarding risk of following your calling, and doing something that you love.
For some people, it is important that what they do reflects their identity, and who they are. As Lewis says, “a calling is an activity that you find so compelling that you wind up organizing your entire self around it — often to the detriment of your life outside of it.” Everyone has a calling, whether they know of it yet or not. For me, my calling writing, and every part of my being is wrapped up in it. From a very young age, I knew that writing was my calling. It helped that teachers would read my work to the class, and enter me in story competitions. I was inspired by my calling at a very young age, I was dedicated and I had the right support system (which is important). Though it’s not easy. You have to be willing, willing to commit to the hard, challenging, and risk-involved work required to make it possible. You have to really want it. You have to be ready to answer the call with conviction.

A job can be anything, and often people will comment on what their calling is, but they are not living it. Getting past the hurdles of making your calling a reality can be very valuable. If it is a matter of your well-being and your happiness, it is vital to consider finding out what your calling is, and how you can exercise it into your life. As it’s been said, it won’t be easy, but with certain skills you are bound to become that much more successful towards finding and living out your calling. Here are some skills that will help you exercise your calling:
• A profound and progressive commitment to making a difference in this direction (this is not about simply wanting it – it’s about committing strongly to it)
• An abundance of positive energy, because this will help fuel you to pursue a calling
• Optimism and consistent thoughts of faith and hope, when all odds are against you
• High spirits, high self-esteem and confidence to know in your heart that your dream is achievable
•An open mind and a flexibility spirit to help shape you, and allow you to learn from your mistakes, and seek help when needed from a support system.
• A lot of risk-acceptance, and the ability to tolerate, and carry on despite instability
• The faith that you couldn’t continue without this work
• A very hard exterior
• The ability to “strengthen up” (build power, ability, and self-mastery) as you grow, you will need external and internal forces
Discover what makes you feel alive, and encourages you to be everything that you can be, and more. Take the time to figure it out, and go do it. The question to ask is what natural strengths and talents you can leverage in service of others and the world, in a way that fills you up, and brings you happiness and reward while doing it.
Live out your calling – and start expressing your true authentic nature, right now, by discovering careers that really speak to your true interests and desires.

Tuesday, May 24, 2016

Everyone Needs Their Own Editor, Including The Editor

We'd all like to think that we are our own best editors. That when we hit the send button, we won't quickly be hitting the edit button as well. In truth, we are prone to hitting the edit button because editing is not easy. Writing is not easy. Most people don't get it on their first try. Let alone do they knock it out of the park. I say this with the chance, that I will publish this article before I notice an error in it. The thing is, I will notice it, but it might be too late. The moment the error has been discovered is the moment you could suffer consequences. While, it has been said, that the editing process is almost never complete. You have to read things over more than just once. You have to read things over period. Being too quick to hit the send button is always a dangerous move. In the case of editing, the Tortoise won the race. Editing, is almost never an impulsive process.
I recently read a job posting that said cover letters and resumes will be disregarded instantly if they have any grammar errors. Without being said, this is probably true for countless corporations. In this age, one error in your copy can break you. You have to be extra careful. I think it is important to strive for perfect copy in every aspect of life. Even when you talk to your friends in text, practise the proper use of grammar and spelling. Take the time to make corrections where you see them because this will help you when you are trying to write a lengthier post. Be mindful of what you write, and how you write it. If you are sending an email to Executives and CEOs, proof read it. It is important that your superiors think you can write. Read each word out loud and see if it makes sense. Are any words missing? How is your syntax?People think they know what a comma is, and really, it's not rocket science, but in fact, a comma is simply a break or pause within a given sentence. Do not write an email with no commas. I can promise you that you will require them. If you are confused, read the sentence out loud. Is there a part within the sentence where it feels too long? That's likely where you need the comma, it is a break or pause for the reader who will take exactly that between each word. 
Upholding impecable writing content particularly goes for anything work related on social media. Do you know how tacky it is to see a successful, professional post a very noticeably, unedited update on LinkedIn? I have had to hold myself back from commenting. Here, this guy is telling a heart-felt Recruitment story, in which he allowed a late interview to take place. He was trying to show that compassion is the right road, but all his great points got lost in it's poor content construction.  I have also found this with Marketing Agencies, and Startups who don't edit their captions. Writing and speaking are not the same thing, if you write like you speak, you will likely be unsuccessful, which is why it is important to get the proper help with writing. Writing needs to be top-quality on every angel, and this includes social. You might have the words, but you just might not know how to use them. It is important to learn. It is like having bad reviews stuck on your Facebook page because you don't have a Social Media person, well there is an answer. Content Companies like Content Chloe can help you with all of this. 

Content Chloe provides affordable, customized, Content solutions to meet your immediate needs. It could be so simple as, you write it, and we clean it up. In addition, we'd be happy to walk you through the process so that you can learn to become a better writer on your own account. Demonstrating good writing is not just about obeying the laws of grammar, it is a direct reflection of your intellect. The ability to write well is an extension of intelligence. It attributes you to a certain quality, taste and capability. Writing is symbolically, your voice, and the way that you chose to use it has massive impact.  

Recently, I was called out for missing some mistakes in my blog, and I felt terrible. As a writer, when you make a noticeable mistake, you feel like a fraud. Like someone has robbed you of your talent. In the end, it was a good thing, it made me remember that I am still learning, and growing, and that mistakes will only help to shape my way.  As a writer, I know my own voice, so I always know what I mean to say. I don't always notice the small mistakes, which is why an outside Editor is helpful to even me. Still, I didn't like the feeling of knowing that my content had errors. I would never promote a service that I myself would not use, and I full-heartily recommended getting help with your content, no matter who you are. 
I knew it was in me to do better. I want to illustrate my connection with words to the best of my ability. I don't want to be a talented musician playing the wrong tunes, but with any art form there is going to be different plateaus of progress and development. While I love to write, and have written for over a decade, there are so many things I have yet to write about. There are so many things that even I have to learn. The relationship with writing is constantly evolving for me as a writer, which is why I think it is important that everyone look at their writing relationship. I think it is important for everyone to communicate the true words that represent them in a honest and honourable light! 

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Saturday, May 21, 2016

Dating a Taurus is Difficult, But They're The Most Loyal Partners


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Friday, April 29, 2016

Ten Things You Need In Your Relationship.

Nobody knows the connection you share with you partner, and nobody should, that is an intimate understanding between you and your mate. We cannot predict why certain couples end up together and why others don’t. Relationships don’t need to make sense to us, as long as they make sense to the people involved. True chemistry is undefinable, and if you have it, you will likely know that it is not explainable. Regardless of what you share with your partner, there are some core things that every person needs from their partner in a relationship. In no particular order, here are ten things to consider about your relationship:
1. Communication
This is a vital necessity in any pairing. Good communication is the glue that keeps even the best of friendships together. Honesty, is always the most important thing to exercise. If you are keeping matters from your partner, suppressing things or speaking lies to them–you are being dishonest. If you feel like you can’t open up to your partner or talk about what is on your mind, this is a problem. If you are constantly shouting at them, or often sitting together in silence, you are not communicating effectively. In these cases, you have to ask yourself, is your partner really your best friend that you tell everything to? You should never be afraid to talk to your partner. Or would you prefer not to be this intimate with your partner, and save that kind of emotional closeness for a friend? We relate to people in different ways for different reasons, regardless, your ability to talk other openly and honestly and emotionally will only ensure that he/she is the one long-term.
2. Sexual Attraction
This doesn’t mean you are constantly going at it. Sex is something that can easily turn on and off in a relationship. It is a lot more complicated of a situation than people assume.  Relationships can easily lose their flame once things become more stable and serious, but it is important that you and your partner stay hot for each other. It is important that you still “want” them. Despite society’s labeling, there is such a guy that looks forward to going home to his wife, and doesn’t care to even hit on or flirt with other girls. If you find yourself constantly emotionally flirting with other people this is a bad sign. This can mean something so simple as talking to old love interests from the past. This behaviour indicates that you are not getting enough attention or the type of attention that you want in your current relationship, and therefore are seeking it elsewhere. People think they remain loyal because they kept their clothes on, but some of the worst types of betrayals are mental and emotional ones. All in all, if you aren’t still hot for each other, in some regard, this should be a concern, unless you’ve both decided on a plutonic existence. Remember, sexual activity is complicated, and completely personal to any individual couple.
This will be something you struggle for and it wont always be easy, but harmony should be the goal.  Whether you’re bickering in the car about directions or what type of wine to get, sometimes there are literally just too many cooks in the kitchen. Most of the time, there can be only one chef. You have to find a way to cook together that satisfies you both. This is not to say it’s impossible for couples to work together, it is possible, and if you are capable of this then this is a excellent sign. Power is always a struggle. Some people want to do it “this way” while others want to do it “that way”–and sometimes people can’t meet in the middle. Some people have to be in control and have things their way. In the end, true love figures it out and resides in a place of harmony. Fighting is normal. It is healthy, but it shouldn’t be a constant matter. We only fight with the people we love. We don’t waste that kind of energy on just anyone. The interest in each other should also be equal, having too much power in a relationship is never a good thing. Even if there is a person to tends to lead more, love should be a two-way street.
Equality stems from harmony as it ensures that everyone feels content. You need to know that while you require to get your needs met, so does your partner. Everyone wants to feel OK. It is important that you express kind words, and encouraging words to your partner. If they are dong a job, tell them so. Tell them that you love them or that they look nice. Remember, you both have life stress, you both have things on your agenda, and you both need the support of each other to ensure that your needs are met. Try to work as a team. Healthy competition is good, as long as your end goal is to benefit both yourself and your partner. Sometimes you will have to be strong for your partner and vice versa. Sometimes you will have to sacrifice your own happiness for theirs, but it all balances out, if you have equality. The beauty of equality is that it compliments the function of unconditional love, in knowing that this person will always there for you.
5. Honesty
The key to all arguments ending successfully in peace is usually honestly. Everyone has secrets, and things they keep to themselves, this is natural. There is no law that we have to tell each other everything, but it’s better if you can be as honest as possible. Not to say, that you have to talk openly and intimately about lovers from your past, but, that yes, you should admit it, you were smoking. No he/she doesn’t like it, but if they love you, they will accept it, and appreciate the honestly. Plain and simple. Even if you never quit, you will be kept around because you are loved, and with the right person who accepts you despite of your vices. It’s typical of people to be like “ssh don’t tell my boyfriend” because nobody want to get in trouble with their significant other. I do think you’ll do better as a couple if you are open about each other’s vices. Being honest in general is a good idea. Don’t have sex just because, don’t pretend you’re fine when you are not. Men are not mind readers, they will apologize you, you just need to tell them what for. Communicate. Don’t let things build up or fester because one day, over something small, you will blow and it won’t be worth it. You will regret it. Pick your battles, always, but know when you need to say something, otherwise it will only come back to haunt you. It is always better to speak the truth, because that’s what’s going to keep you feeling good in your relationships, lies only cause anxiety.
6. Loyalty
Loyalty is not the opposite of jealousy, but it is an extension of trust. Loyalty, doesn’t mean that you can’t have friends of the opposite sex. It just means that you can’t sleep with them. While it some relationships it might mean that you can, as long as you have a understanding about your definition of loyalty with your partner then that’s perfectly fine. Open relationships are one thing, but cheating is another. Drawing a blind eye to a cheating partner is never a good idea. You can’t be afraid to love again if you lose love, even if it feels like there could be no one else. There is, and the moment you are ready to open up to love again that person will come along. You have to know that you deserve loyalty from your partner, and that they should in turn have your back. Being loyal comes in all kinds of shapes and forms, for some it is the loyalty to take care of the other when they are sick, for others it’s not hitting on your friends. Loyalty is like trust, without it, you can’t build a true and solid relationship.
7. Laughter
This is an important one, if you plan to grow old together. As a couple, you need to be making a lifetime of inside jokes. Jokes that only you two would understand. You need to know how to make each other laugh, even in the middle of an argument.  If you can’t laugh with your partner than you are truly missing out. Arguably, you likely are not with the right person if you don’t find yourself laughing with them. Unless dealing with unique circumstances, in which laughing seems inappropriate, having laughter in your relationship is a huge benefit. Laughter and love are the best medicines and they go hand and hand. You need to be able to cheer your partner up. It is important to make each other laugh and smile as much as possible.
This can only be described, as the indescribable, “heat”. It’s that feeling that you simply have no words for. At times, it can makes your knees weak. Whether it be sexual, mental, or hopefully both, this person just gets you on every level. To the point, where simply the thought of them can render a smile. You feel a connection with this person and it is unlike any other. They just get you. You jive so well with this person,  and share an unspoken bond of quality and greatness in your relationship that makes it totally unique. Nobody else has to understand it. Chemistry also means that you are comfortable with this person. You can be at your worst and at your best around this person, and they still love you. This goes for appearances too. If you feel the constant need to be made up for your partner then this could be a concern. Being loved, accepted and desired for who you are naturally is key.

9. Opposition
This doesn’t mean you will be opposing energies, but rather that you will challenge each other. I do vote that it is better to have a Captain and a First Mate, oppose to two captains in a relationship. Different types of energy is good, and sometimes there needs to be a balance of the masculine and the feminine. I have seen many cases where the female is the masculine energy in the relationship, and it works wonderfully. Even if you both insist on wearing the captain’s hat, as long as you can create some opposition for the other (some challenge), this is good. People need a different way of looking at things, and it’s good to learn from your partner–it’s good to push them every once in awhile. One guy told me, of his girlfriend (now wife) at the time, “she makes me better because she challenges me.” She drove him to be the best that he could be in many capacities. She ensured he knew what he could be, and wouldn’t let him lose sight of that. A partner who won’t let you lose fight, is a partner who truly loves you. A good partner will want to see you succeed.

10. Love
This is the magical glue that holds it all together. You do not have to explain that you love someone, you just have to know in your heart that you do. Everyone needs to feel love in their relationship. This is not something you should ever question. Physically, mentally, verbally–love needs to be felt on all levels. Love needs to be spoken and expressed. If you lack affection with your partner, you should ask why. If this is your choice, then by all mean, this is fine, but love shows itself to others. Not saying public displays are needed, but you’ll find that the couples who are quite crazy about each other can’t really keep their hands off the other, even well into their marriages. This type of love is out there is if you want it, you just have to make sure you’ve met the right match.
Are you able to check off all ten of these things? I’m sure that no one is, but in a perfect world it would be nice to know you have these elements in your relationship. If you are having doubts, but waiting for the ring, think it over, and make sure you are satisfied on every level. He’s still gong to be the same person after you get married. This goes for men as well, getting married is not going to change anything in your relationship except make it more serious. A lot of people are together, and a lot of people are in love, but sadly not all of this discovered love will last. We don’t live in a world where everything is forever, but somethings will last for as long as they possible can, and somethings won’t. Sometimes you are shaken to your core by a kind of love that if you look for it, you will see it all the time. If you have time to take a good look, I’m pretty certain you will see that true love is all around you.t your current relationship.

Thursday, April 14, 2016

Everyone is Selfish.

It might seem harsh, but when you really think about it, there is some truth to it. Everyone wants to feel loved and receive attention, which is why people will wait for you to come to them. If you find yourself at home alone, do you think it could be because you didn’t contact anyone. Or see if anyone was free? You might expect people to think about you. It doesn’t mean they don’t want to see you, but it’s your job to look out for your own needs. You get to a certain age where you sort of have to invite yourself. The selfish desire is that things will fall into our lap. Sadly, the world does not work this way, likely because everyone is stuck thinking this way.

Think about how you are with your phone. How many times do you read messages and reply back later? This is because your life comes first, and obviously you want to put thought into your responses and would rather wait for when you have time. Except sometimes, people might require help in the moment, can you say you would be able to determine when to pick up a call, and when to let one slide?

It’s not only this, people will treat you the way you treat them. So and so didn’t wish you a happy birthday, or whoever didn’t reply to your last message. Is there a harm in being the bigger person? If someone unfollows you and you still like them, do you automatically have to unfollow back? We’d be shocked to know how much our behaviour is based off of interactions like this. When people’s feelings get hurt, they tend to respond in the same way, protecting themselves from what they perceive as pain or rejection.

Sometimes the good things we do end up being about us. We buy gifts waiting for our thank you, and we notice when we don’t get our credit. When certain people forget to make you a birthday collage, or others forget your birthday all together – it really has nothing to do with you. People are trained to expect compliments to be returned, and there is no such reality where one person doesn’t see how much more they are giving than the other. Not to say that there is always one more selfish person in the relationship, but isn’t there? The balancing of egos is hard to achieve, but relationships run a lot smoother when there is some one with an empathic ear present.
It’s like the Friends episode where Joey tells Phoebe that there is no such thing as a selfless good deed, and she struggles to find it. We can’t help but be driven to do things that make us feel good. For some people, that is killing coldness with kindness (satisfying their need for everything to be OK all the time with everyone) for others it is giving presents and making personal shout outs. Whatever it may be, a lot of the “nice” things we do often prove to be self-serving. We live in a nice for nice culture. Meaning, I stroke your back, now you stroke mine.

Selfishness is easily disgusted, but it comes in little doses like a friend who ignores you all night, but suddenly starts talking to you when they needs a smoke. Or when an ignorant, and some-what shitty waitress starts talking to you the moment she hands you the card machine. People’s selfish intentions might be coated in kindness, but their transparency still holds true. The self desires will always trump others, and when they don’t, we may find that we resent the people we spend all our time fixing. Nothing doesn’t come at a cost, and people remember when they’ve slaved it out for you. People move forward with you, but they don’t forget. You have to be mindful of this, knowing that people remember how you affected them, and they will react to you according to how you’ve reacted to them. Some people protect the self far too much, and don't let many things go, while others will know when the self intents of their people are too blatant to ignore.

The point is not to go around calling people selfish, but to recognize that people, In many ways, are built the same. We all want love, attention and success. We all want to be cared for and appreciated. The moment we focus on how we are alike, oppose to how we are different is the moment that we truly make gain in this world. Perhaps it is the moment we stop factoring our own needs into our good deeds.